By My Standards
by Sparky Strike Girl
Summary: What's beauty? Beauty describes a lot of things, doesn't it? But by my own standards, anything could be beautiful. Even me. Oneshot, slight GaaMatsu and hinted KankuMatsu. Matsuri's POV. Just a cute little one shot... NO FLAMES!


**By My Standards**

My first story ^_^ So happy to be doing this ^_^ So happy, so happy.

Yeah, this is just a small oneshot for Matsuri and Gaara ^_^ No flames... please.

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_Beauty_. What did that word _mean_ anyway? What _was_ beauty?

If I asked Sakura, she'd give me some sort of wordy definition, something like "qualities that give pleasure to the senses"... And I would _still_ be at lost to its meaning.

If I asked Tenten, she'd make some joke about it, give me a not-so-light punch on my shoulder, and tell me not to worry about it.

If I asked Ino, she'd go on some sort of dramatic and romantic speech, and somehow unintentionally blow away my ego because I was pretty average if I ever compared myself to her. That was life.

I never really considered asking Temari or Hinata about it... Because Temari would probably respond the same way as Tenten, and Hinata, in all her brilliant innocence, would be momentarily stumped before exclaiming all her favorite things that she considered 'beautiful', from beads to pudding to elephants.

Asking Okaa-san was out of the question as well, but I'd still wonder.

Roses were beautiful, sunsets were beautiful, and _love_ was beautiful.

But what about me?

I already knew how I am compared to Ino, but I always cut short on _something_.

Sakura was _smart_, I wasn't. Not at all. I couldn't even score _half_ the points on a decent test.

Tenten was _athletic_, I wasn't. Obviously, with my clumsiness.

Temari was _optimistic_, I wasn't. Not that much, anyway... Being the unlucky and all...

Hinata was _happy-go-lucky_, I wasn't. Not really. If you remember the statement above.

The more I thought about it, did anyone think I was beautiful? I never sought to ask, I was scared. Of what? Of not getting answered honestly.

If I asked my friends, I'd get the same answer. ("You _are_, Matsuri. Why do you doubt yourself?" most likely.)

It's hypocritical, it's contradictory. It's just me. Being the unluckiest girl did have its perk. I knew I was pretty, beautiful by my own standards.

But when it came to everyone else, I began doubting myself.

Especially when it came to guys. The two in question.

I wouldn't dare ask Kankuro if he thought I was pretty unless I _wanted_ to be insulted...even though in a way I was use to him insulting me. "You, pretty?" he'd snort, already making me boil with anger at the thought. "Please, any guy who'd think that would need glasses, Matsu."

What does he know anyway? I'd wonder that. I'd also wonder why it was that his opinion mattered so much...

But not _nearly_ as much as the other guy I held a special interest in.

Gaara.

If it was possible for guys to be 'beautiful', that was Gaara-kun all over. He was practically the fairy tale prince that all princesses had in mind when in need of rescuing, which is funny, because he actually _was_ a prince... Somewhat.

Gaara was everything Kankuro wasn't. Polite, calm, generous, level-headed. No wonder I loved (more like obsessed over, really) the guy.

Sadly, he still saw me as a dear friend of his, not a girl. A _friend_.

And I worried what would happen if I happened to ask him if he thought I was beautiful. Not because he might deny it, but because he probably wouldn't answer _honestly_.

He was like my friends, in that matter...which was alright for him. If only he knew, right?

But it's funny, he's complimented me before, calling me "charming" or "kind" or "likable". But he's _never_ called me pretty. Not once. Charming doesn't cut it.

So sucking it up like a man...er, girl...I guess... I finally decided to ask.

"Gaara-kun?"

"Hm? What is it, Matsuri?"

"Do you think I'm...pretty?"

He blinked, completely off guard by the question. I sucked in my lip, waiting, heart pounding. I didn't know why. He said the exact same thing I expected he would.

Taking a deep breath, he just stated the words, "You're a very pretty girl, Matsuri."

...Why didn't I feel any better? At least it was better than him just avoiding the question or laughing about it, thinking it was a joke. But instead, I felt disappointed. I should have been ecstatic that Gaara would say that to me.

So I milked it a bit.

"Sakura-chan's pretty, isn't she?"

He shrugged, a little confused. "I guess she is..."

"Tenten-chan's pretty, isn't she?"

"I suppose..."

"Hinata-chan's pretty, isn't she?"

Of course she was and I almost wondered why Gaara didn't prefer her over me...to spare Naruto's feelings, perhaps?

But he just stared at me with worried sea moss-colored eyes, as if concerned for my current state of mind.

"...Where are we going with this, Matsuri?"

I exhaled a sigh, shaking my head, my cheeks already shamefully flushed.

"I-It's nothing..."

Gaara raised an eyebrow at that, and I half-expected him to just leave it at that, but he didn't.

"Why so worried about your looks, Matsuri? You're just fine the way you are."

I just shook my head, sighing. My fairy-tale prince sighed as well, looking up at the sky with those unclear, but still beautiful sea moss eyes.

"Hinata's pretty," he admitted, dampening my spirits a bit. "She's gentle, kind, and passive .That's why Naruto likes her... I'm always worried that I could hurt her by accident if I tried to like her... I'm not as gentle as Naruto is."

I nodded at that, sighing. Even though I couldn't imagine Gaara-kun and Hinata-chan together, this was easy to believe... Though a part of me, the overprotective best friend part most likely, wanted to snap and say that she wasn't as delicate as he thought she was.

"Tenten's the opposite," he laughed, almost pleased to see I was listening. "She's pretty, of course... But unlike Hinata, she's more stubborn, outgoing, funny... But I'm actually worried that she could hurt _me_ rather than the other way around... That's why I let Neji mess with her; he can actually _handle_ it...unlike me."

I almost laughed myself. This was easier to believe, considering it was really no secret that Tenten's temper had a tendency to scare away potential candidates... But we all loved her for that anyway.

"Now, Ino..." Gaara began, and I swallowed a lump in my throat. That purple idol always has her admirers, and I wouldn't be surprised if he...

"She's not my type."

...Wait a minute, say _wha_?

"She's pretty, Matsuri, believe me, but..." he smiled, shrugging. "She's just different. She's flashy, famous, elegant... But I can't handle the kind of admiration and dedication that her fans have... Choji's different. He may not be a bit of a show-off, but he has enough perseverance to be able to at least _try_ keeping up with her... I'm not really as inspired as he is."

I stare at him, my jaw dropped and my eyes bulging. I just couldn't imagine someone like him not being even the _slightest_ bit interested in Ino... I mean, _really_...

"W-What about Temari-chan? O-Or Sakura-chan?" I squeaked, my voice uncharacteristically shy... I was really nervous about all this, huh?

"Sakura and Temari?" he seemed bewildered by the question but smiled, shaking his head with a sigh, his cool, pale hand touching my warm, tanned one. "Sakura reminds me a lot like you, Matsuri. Silly, kind, fun to be around, but... She has a bit of the same issue Hinata does..."

I blink, my hand fidgeting under his.

"I am...confused. Sorry." And this said confusion was growing with every minute I tried to make sense of what he was saying in my head.

"Of course you are; it's confusing to me as well..." Smiling, he rolled his eyes, exhaling a light breath. "Temari's something special, too... You did a fine job with how she turned out, Matsuri."

I blushed at that, blood rushing up to my cheeks...despite the fact that I failed to realize he just avoided the question.

"She's funny, carefree, strong; kinda like you...but she's secretly frightened, very aware of the world and its evils, however... I don't want to taint her more, and neither do you, Matsuri."

_Ah._

So Temari was beautiful in the way only a _young woman _could be... They do say ignorance is bliss, but...

"What does that have to do with me, Gaara-kun?"

A devilish smirk played on his lips, making my heart race.

"Isn't it obvious, Matsuri? You're everything they aren't. You're not as delicate as Hinata yet not as assertive as Tenten and Temari. I don't have to worry about hurting you too much or making you angry... So what if you're not famous like Ino? That just means that I can keep you all to myself. You're perfect."

To say I was stupefied would be an understatement. I pinched myself to see if I was dreaming.

...Ouch. Not dreaming.

"...Matsuri, I'm being honest." He gave me that perfect smile of his as he laughed, patting the top of my head. "You're pretty, believe me... It's almost an understatement... And I'm not as kind and decent as you take me for, you know. And if this helps anything, I'm sure Kankuro-kun would agree with me on every matter."

After the speech he just gave me, this didn't surprise me as much as it would have on a regular day.

"...I see." I responded, blinking.

"So here's a question of my own, Matsuri," Gaara began, entwining our fingers. "What made you ask that in the first place?"

I just shrugged, a smile crossing my lips, tightening my hand around his so that I could plant a kiss on his cheek.

"Just making sure...and thank you, Gaara-kun."

I give him a smile of my own as I laughed, and his expression became serious for a moment.

"What are you even thanking me for, Matsuri? You already knew all that, right?"

I guess in a way, I did. But hearing those words through his lips really made a difference...though I wasn't going to tell him that. Not any time soon.

It's funny, beautiful is quite an ambiguous term, isn't it? In a way, I'm glad for that.

I'm not smart like Sakura, athletic like Tenten, famous like Ino, optimistic like Temari, irrepressible like Hinata-chan, or even mature like my little sister Kiki (I made her)... I'm just me. Dumb, clumsy, average, pessimistic, touchy, and immature me.

But despite that, I'm beautiful and loved. And despite what anyone says, including myself, that's not going to change any time soon.

But, first things first. I'm going to need a long, complicated chat with a certain Kankuro about the things Gaara said to me.

And if that idiot is as dense as I am, I may need to borrow that Kazekage prince's speaking skills.

Just this once.

And it's for the sake of honesty, thank you very much, not making myself feel any better.

Then again, with my experiences, the latter sounds almost as great as the former.

Almost, anyway.

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Yeah, so, I know, not too good for my first fanfiction, but please **DON'T FLAME! **I've actually written quite a few stories but this is my first fanfiction one. Also my first for writing Gaara and Matsuri ^_^

Tah tah!


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